So, as previously posted, NASA's got plans to build a big fat moon shack in the next score, not to be confused with a baker’s score. In the spirit of this I did a bunch of "research" (booze + typing = research) relating to the topic of moon life & lunar bases. But then I was interrupted by life and had to back-burner my little foray into interstellar hogwash. Well, daddy caught a break and penciled a little time into his date book for stupidity. In the words of Neil Innes, “Ladies and gentlemen I’ve suffered for my art long enough, now it’s your turn.”
So, as many people know, this recent plan for lunar denizenry is far from the first. In fact the US has planned on getting to and utilizing the moon in more ways than should be legally allowed. Some plans have included using the moon as the ultimate military high ground (Betcha’ didn’t see that one comin’ Sun Tzu, you wacky bastard!), or detonating a nuke on the surface just for shits and giggles. Awesome. But the real question that NASA and the global space community needs to be asking themselves is are we going to be arriving on an empty rock?
While it may be a satellite of the Earth, is the moon really the Earth’s satellite? Or has it been annexed by another species, and if so does that make our astronauts illegal aliens? What about Dennis Hope, the man who laid claim to the moon in 1980 and has been selling property rights ever since. And is anyone prepared for the possibility of engaging with a contingent of space-Nazis (that’s right, space-Nazis)? Luckily this is slated to be an international effort, so we can hopefully muster up a little Allied reunion if need be.
Speaking of which, just how excited is the international community about this? Alain Berinstain, the Canadian Space Agency's director of planetary exploration and space astronomy (as opposed to the widely popular undersea astronomy) proudly declared "Why not!" when asked if a Canadian could take part in the international effort. Oh, Canada! People may not realize that the Ruskies had a few plans for a moon base in their bag of tricks…if only they could have figured out that whole landing on the moon thing. Apparently the Chinese have also considered going the whole moon base route, but it seems they’re a bit off of the time table of regular moon trips by 2005.
Anyway you slice it the moon is a crazy place that rouses curiosity, conviction, and conspiracy; but at least you can still get work there.rock.
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